Off my usual topic of governance but this was a response to a question from a new community that I thought might be helpful to all new communities, and some settled ones. What should we buy of the kitchen? A new community will have lots of donations, particularly if they put out the call for things as people anticipate downsizing. People who haven't moved in many years will have lots of extra stuff. Look for "Professional Quality" or "Professional Grade" to find the best products for large group cooking. Find a store that chiefly sells to designers, contractors, building managers, and architects because they will have a full line of products and will be more honest and knowledgable because their business is volume and return customers. Don't expect the tableware to match. Design a place where appliances can be both stored and used.
I received this email from Leah Fisher in response to my opening "Alleviating Fear" article in Cohousing Now! eNews (#71, 10/28/14). Leah makes a compelling case for "fear of regret" as a stumbling block in committing to cohousing, and suggests, "Support for dealing effectively with these concerns could be of great value to prospective members."
I was very drawn to your article about Fear related to co-housing, but I would like to suggest a more fundamental fear that I understand as a psychotherapist and that I experience personally with regard to co-housing. It is this: Fear of Regret. [please read more]
Re-posted from eNews: Cohousing Now #71 Alleviating Fear
I was struck by Marilynne Robinson's assertion in a recent issue of NY Times Magazine (10/5/14): "Fear has, in this moment, a respectability I've never seen in my life." She was referring to what she thinks is a "default posture" of human beings: fear. This recalled for me a presentation at Shadowlake Village that included a slide on safety. I thought: how smart to address, our "default" concern of navigating a dangerous world. Fear may be the motivator for questions among those seeking cohousing: is it safe? can I feel secure? We are all looking to alleviate fears and live in a safe and secure environment. [read more]
I'm currently immersed in four days of FIC organizational meetings, where a key focus has been how to make better connections with others trying to build cooperative culture. Essentially, those of us with deep familiarity in community living believe that we're learning something in the crucible of that experience that has wide application—in neighborhoods, in the workplace, in schools, and in churches—yet we're frustrated with the lack of invitations to share what we know. What's going on?
Last week in Nevada City, a team of over 20 attendees – having traveled from as far away as Brazil – participated in a week-long workshop on Aging Successfully in senior cohousing. The concept stems from a workshop in Denmark that is designed to set seniors up for success, called Study Group One. The approach is outlined in Charles Durrett’s book, Senior Cohousing: A Community Approach to Independent Living. Participants included development professionals, architects and people who are already working on or want to start their own cohousing communities.
What a great community we have at Silver Sage Village!
And if anyone asks about how many it takes to boil a lobster ... the answer is simple: It takes a village to boil a lobster at least the village at Silver Sage. When we started to plan on Monday for the Lobster Boil ... many knew it would be fun! Yet I think the "adventure" of the entire evening with everyone contributing AND enjoying either "handling", cooking or even avoiding the crustaceans made our gathering FUN for all but the dozen lobsters!
I arrived home at midnight after a long weekend in Boulder, attending the Regional Cohousing Conference. I should have been exhausted, but I was wired after the energizing gathering. A success by any measure, we had close to 90 folks attend, 2/3’s from outside Colorado, including Minnesota, Mississippi, California, Texas, Missouri – even a few folks from Canada, and one from Australia! The conference program had a spontaneous flavor (Jim Leach described it as “cohousie” in organization), and thus allowed for abundant story sharing and organic issue discussion. Many who attended are part of forming groups, with lots of questions; others had enjoyed many years of cohousing life and were interested in ways to enhance the vibrancy of their community. There were two sessions that particularly influenced me.